I always hear at least one great quote from each episode of Grey’s Anatomy. In this year’s season opener my favorite quote was, “It’s not dying pain, it’s healing pain.”
I love this distinction. There are so many times in our lives where we feel as if life is falling apart. Relationships crumble, businesses stumble, and everything in the house seems to break down at once. Generally we stay busy holding ourselves together. If there is a moment to stop, we may fall into the pain. How far do you fall?
If you feel like dying, then you fall hard. You may feel like life won’t get better. You feel like you’re losing the fight.
If you can instead sense that your pain is a healing pain, that you are overcoming roadblocks that always stand in the way of joy, then you can allow yourself a good cry before you pick yourself back up and move on. Sometimes it take the breakdown–being knocked to your knees–before the breakthrough can happen.
Life always presents change, which may bring losses as well as wisdom and eventually, opportunity. If you can move to the center of the swift-moving river instead of trying to hang on for dear life, your pain will heal you.
This lesson is essential for high-achievers who don’t fall down too often. In the previous three to five years, life seemed to be on an upward swing for most of my clients. This last year tripped many of us, knocking the wind out of our sails (and sales) and out of our hearts. I have seen people experience what they thought was dying pain in the past year.
Yet this year is also presenting an amazing possibility for renewal. Many of us are re-creating our work and our lives to better align with our passion. We are re-assessing work values and well as life values. We are wondering if being so busy is worth it. Now is the time to rekindle dreams and connections. The pain is real but is part of the healing.
We can’t escape the pains of life. We can control how we live with these pains.
• How long will you feel like everything is falling apart?
• How quickly can you feel the pain of healing?
• Do you have any suggestions for making the shift? Please share them here.
Let the healing begin.