First, I want to thank all of you who helped me choose my book title. The winner is…Wander Woman: How High-Achieving Women Find Contentment and Direction. It will be released June 2010. Can’t wait to share more with you.
Now…on High Achievers and Scarcity…
I would have thought that High-Achievers looked at life as an abundant well of opportunity. After reading Lloyd Thomas’ article on Scarcity, I have a different perspective.
Kahil Gibran writes: “to be thirsty when your well is full is a thirst which is unquenchable.” A scarcity mentality is when, no matter how much you have, it is never enough. You remain continuously unsatisfied. High achievers feel this way when they have a gut sense that there is always something more to achieve. Therefore, you might have a belief that your accomplishments, or the recognition for what you can achieve, will never be enough.
The upside is that you are driven to accomplish great things; the downside is that you limit your celebration of what you have created so far in your life. If it’s not good enough, it’s not time to celebrate. When you come from scarcity, you tend to limit your consumption. This includes drinking in the beauty of your life.
On the darker side, you may feel resentment about others who have what you lack (grander achievements). This further serves to effectively exclude you from feeling proud of what you have accomplished so far.
To reverse the psychologically damaging effects of a scarcity belief, you must engage in paradoxical behavior. In other words, whatever you need, give it away. Give someone else recognition for something you could have done yourself. Help other people today even though they could outshine you tomorrow. Create celebrations of achievement for others so that you may reflect on your own path. Help others feel acceptance, significance, joyful and proud. What grander accomplishment can you create?
Does this sound strange? As Lloyd says, “If you don’t understand any of today’s column, simply explain it to somebody else.”
It’s time to stop and appreciate what wonders you have created to date in this life. There are many more things you can and will do. And, you truly have time to take a moment to sit back and admire who you have become.
Lloyd Thomas of Practical Life Coaching writes fabulous articles on the issues we all face in life. You can subscribe to receive these nuggets at http://tinyurl.com/na9fyv.